The Guy Who Saw Through My “Never” (aka: Something Very Good)

You know how, when you find something really good, you just can’t wait to tell someone?

It’s been my habit for so many years now. Whenever something wonderful happened to me, I couldn’t wait to share it with the whole world. The perfect sunset sky, smeared with salmon pink and the deepest indigo, deserves an immediate photo, complete with poem, on this blog. A hipster coffee shop who makes the perfect almond milk latte gets a shoutout on Yelp. That funny movie that made me laugh/weep/think? Instant mini-review on Twitter.

Good things are even better when they are shared.

But recently, something very, very good has happened to me. I met someone who is very special to me, and we are now an exclusive couple.

I know, I know. Shock! Amazement! The girl who said “Never” did a complete 180!

It took me by surprise, too. I could never have guessed that someone could waltz into my life, see right through my “Never,” and break down the walls of fear I’d built so high around myself. It took me by surprise that someone could make me see colors that didn’t even exist before he came along. That someone could become the yin to my yang in such a complete way, that I am not even tempted to look back at what I lost before.

But world, that is all I can give you. It is all I can share. I have found something so wonderful, and so pure, that for the first time ever, I don’t want to share it with all of you. I want to keep it to myself, safe in my heart.

Also, I’m never going to say Never, ever again.

Whoops. I mean, I am going to be very careful about using the word Never from here on out.

20 responses to “The Guy Who Saw Through My “Never” (aka: Something Very Good)

  1. Yessss, enjoy your private joy and I love your line “surprise that someone could make me see colors that didn’t even exist before he came along.” πŸ™‚

    • Hi there, Poison 21! (Is your name inspired by actual poison or the rock band? I’ve often wondered). I miss our lively discussions, too. Blogging was such a nice way to express ideas and thoughts and to share them with fellow bloggers as we all travel together on our life journeys. I miss that aspect of it very much.

      I haven’t blogged in months, I know. I discovered along the way that my ex husband and his wife had somehow found my blog, though it’s rather anonymous, and I choose not to share it in real life or on my social media sites. It made me feel increasingly uncomfortable to know that they were reading so much about my private life, especially after my ex sent me some angry text messages about a poem I wrote, where I shared some of my painful experiences of being married to him. Since then, I felt I had to be very guarded in what I wrote. Controlled yet again, even after escaping that marriage. πŸ˜‘ I began to question the value of my continuing to share details about my personal life online, even though I attempted to do so anonymously. I’m not sure if I will return to blogging. I am immersed in trying to learn to live an actual life, and sharing with real people, like my wonderful boyfriend of almost 8 months now. I do pop in from time to time to comment on other bloggers’ posts and will continue to do so, as I enjoy sharing in your lives and making contact with some really neat people from around the globe. Thank you so much for reaching out! 😊

      • God no, not the hair band!

        “Every rose has its thorn
        Just like every night has its dawn”

        You can find the explanation in my About page and my “What’s in a Screen Name” post.

        Your thoughts and feelings are always valid; they are your truths. I also understand the healing power of putting words to paper. I didn’t find anything malicious in your writing, just honest soul-searching which requires a lot of courage, especially when sharing it with others.

        I am very happy for you and your current life experiences. You are now so above the fray, your ex can’t touch you.

        Looking at the recent political events playing out in front of us, I better understand the value of respectful conversation and debate, something that has been missing in our society for so long. In some of our exchanges you have illuminated things for me, to the point where I sometimes see where I’m off track. That is a special gift.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s